Friday, February 10, 2006
Ryland
Almost every morning when I don't have another obligation, I meet a friend at Bob Evans Restaurant. Marlene and I worked together at our elementary school. She kept the school going as head secretary...I was just a teacher. :-)
We retired about the same time. I retired in 1999 when the school board offered an early out. She followed the next year under the same program. Marlene's youngest daughter has three children who are all now in school. This past fall she began taking care of a baby for a young couple. The mother works with Marlene's daughter at the Eye Center downtown. When the baby was just a couple of months old, she had to have open heart surgery to repair a couple of holes in her heart. She was in All Children's Hospital in St. Petersburg for a while, and it was after that that Marlene began to take care of her. Those of us who have seen her regularly are just so thrilled to see this little girl grow and flourish. Ultrasounds had not shown these defects.
Two other little girls were born last year. Their parents knew before they were born that they would not live very long. Both little girls had chromosomal disorders. The doctors of the parents here in our town did not encourage them to bond with the baby or to bring the children to visit. When the baby was born, they did bond, and the children did come to visit. Then the parents said, "We want to take her home." The doctors said that if she could be weaned off the respirator, they could bring her home, and they did. The said that when she came home, she was so content, as though she knew right where she was. The dear little girl lived for about two weeks after she came home to be with her parents and her sisters and brother. The other little girl was born in New York State. Her mom and dad, a young pastor and his wife, also desired to bring their baby home, and they were able to. She did not live nearly as long, but the comment was made that she too seemed to know when she was brought home. At the memorial service for the little girl here in Bradenton, we were able to see by DVD her short life, and the last sounds we heard were her lusty cries. At the end of both services of these children, balloons were released toward heaven. Both little girls had been named by their parents before they were born so that we could know them and pray for them. I don't know what it must be like to lose a child at any age. I lost my dear husband unexpectedly in 2002 in a terrible accident, and I know how that is. I do know that God knows all about it, and He is the God of all comfort for those who sorrow.
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3 comments:
I don't see how anyone could be advised not to "bond" with a child they have carried and felt for nine months. Other children in the family have known that a baby brother or sister was coming as well. I was completely bonded with Nyssa a long time before she actually made her dramatic entrance.
Although the little girls didn't live long lives, I'm sure they were more influential in the lives of others than many who live to be 100.
My favorite Psalm is 121: I lift up my eyes to the hills - where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. It has comforted me through a wide variety of losses and hurts.
I am very sorry for your loss and at the same time very happy for you; you loved and were deeply loved in return and there are so many in this world who will never know even a small taste of that kind of love. Not only will God comfort you but lifetime of memories will as well.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read my blog. Yes, those two little girls did indeed leave their mark. Thank you to for your thoughts about my husband. He was a good man, an electrical contractor who touched many lives by being a friend to his clients as well as someone who did their work. Maybe I should blog about him next. So many told me that he not just their electrician but their friend. So many older people here in Florida are so afraid they're going to be "taken" by people who work for them. Don certainly wasn't that person.
Thanks for stopping by.
This is a very moving article. I know that sometimes doctors have good intentions, but like srp, I cannot imagine anyone being told to not bond with their child. Regardless of the condition, their is already a bond there.
I am sorry to hear about the loss of your husband. I pray that the grace of God will be with you. Thanks for visiting my blog.
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