I taught school for 36 years. Many teachers do not throw things away. I am one of those. You don't want to throw it away, for if you do, you'll need it tomorrow. If you've been reading this blog any time at all, you know that I am thinking of relocating to live near my son and his family. My daughter and I have decided life is too short; friends are wonderful, but family is where it's at. Because of Ella's CF, it is likely that they will stay where they are for a good while since they are so close to a certified CF clinic at UVA Children's Hospital.
I have lived in the same house for 30 years. My husband and I had it built when I was pregnant with my daughter. I'm now in the process of sorting through STUFF and discarding. We don't have basements here, so my garage has accumulated a lot of the STUFF. I can park my car in it at night, however.
Books, books, and more books. Many of them are children's books that I held on to primarily for any grandchildren who might come along. Some of them I've already sent to Ella for her ever-growing library...books like The Very Hungry Caterpillar by Eric Carle, Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See? and some gems by Jan Brett and Mary Engelbreit. Yesterday I went out into the garage to pack up some more, and there were yet more.
I've always said that if I cleaned out a spot, more STUFF would just rise up to take its place.
When my husband died, I didn't dispose of his belongings right away. Little by little, I've gotten rid of things, but it's hard to let go. The first thing to go was the drawer of socks. Whenever I bought him new socks, they went into the drawer with the old ones until you could hardly close the drawer. I know it should have been my job to keep them culled out, but I didn't always.
There is a wonderful organization in St. Pete called D&D Missionary Homes, and they operate a clothes closet for missionaries who have need of clothing. When they're getting ready to go back to the mission field, they can go into the "store" and take as much as they feel that they can use for their next term of service. If they're going back to the field with small children, they can take clothes in graded sizes, as many as they think they need. So when I finally decided to take his clothes out of the closet, I filled a couple of suitcases full and sent them there.
Now that I'm getting serious about cleaning out STUFF, I looked in the closet this morning. There, hanging, were two suits that I had bought for Don in the early years of our marriage. They are in wonderful condition, and as far as I know, are not out of style. I loved them when I bought them, and I still do. I hope that someone passing through D&D Homes wears a 44 Long. They will find two nice suits.
When I lived in Haiti, clothing would come there in "missionary barrels." The missionary kids were funny when they talked about where they had gotten their latest fashions. Our field director was bemoaning the fact that he never got any suits because he said, "No one ever dies my size."
So, as I took the clothing to my church this morning, to be picked up and taken to D&D, I held those suits one last time, remembering.
6 comments:
There will be a very grateful missionary in the future of those suits. I know how hard it is to move. Being a preacher's kid, we moved quite often and each time it was hard. I wondered if it let be become more of a gypsy and less clingy to "things" but I still have to watch myself about that. But family and people and our witness and interactions are what makes all the difference.
Hi Beverly, I think we are kindred spirits. Though my husband hasn't passed away everything else in your post is us.
After living in our home for 40 years we are moving too. 40 years of stuff, collections, parents estates and just plain stuff. We feel we need to be closer to family too and in a less expensive area. Both bathrooms have been remodeled and now our kitchen is torn apart. No stove and next monday will be no kitchen sink either. Wednesday the new cooktop should arrive along with new granite counters. Then we will be back in business. The realtor and her design consultant came today to say what else should be done so we get the most bang for our buck. While our son's brother in law is doing all the rebuilding work, we pack, pack, pack. Some to sell at a garage sale, some to our church thrift shop, some to Goodwill and some to take with us. There's no room to put anything and so its shift from one place to another. Very exhausting.
The thought about your husbands sock drawer is mine exactly. I thought I was a good housekeeper until i have to purge...groan.
Well I have a few more posts to look at and then its back to work. Take care and have a nice weekend.
I don't envy you the job of cleaning and sorting things out. I've had to do that for a couple households (not mine) and it's a huge job.
Glad you found a good place to donate your husband's suits..
:)
You write so beautifully about the way we move on, the way we remember, and the way we reconcile the two. I've learned something so important by visiting tonight. Thank you for that.
I know how hard it is to part with some stuff.. especially those items that hold personal memories. The good thing is .. that even after the stuff is gone.. we still have the memories.
I think I might keep the children's books though. They sound wonderful.
Beverly
It is hard to 'let go'. It seems like such an easy task, but it isn't. I find it amazing how much memory can reside in an object. I do like my 'things' still, but I find as I age I am less attached. I hope your move goes well for you as I can only imagine how hard that is with all the memories you have in your home.
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